One of the most powerful tools for connecting with your partner is role-playing. The longer you’re in a relationship, the more you tend to get into a routine with work, maybe even kids, and everyday life. Role-playing brings back a certain excitement and thrill to your sex life.
The first couple of times you both go at this, it’s going to feel silly, but you’re feeling and being silly together. The idea is play and eroticism. Playing and laughing go hand in hand with role-playing.
When you’re stuck in the monotony of every day, staring at a pile of laundry that needs to be folded, it can be hard to feel sexy and get out of your routine.
When you role-play, you can forget your to-do list and your obligations. Instead, tap into the feelings that you and your partner had when you first met, or explore interests that you’ve never shared with your partner.
Here are the best role-playing ideas for couples:
Perhaps the most popular role-playing idea of all is the concept of the sexy stranger. It’s simple and straightforward; you don’t need any props or clothes. To make the hot stranger work, go somewhere you both aren’t familiar with and arrive separately. It doesn’t always need to be a bar; instead, consider a book store or a coffee shop. Begin by giving each other glances from across a room. Then buy your partner a coffee or open up a conversation about the book they’re holding. Let events unfold naturally and see where it goes.
This is one of my favorite ways to role-play. It doesn’t get any better than the masseuse/masseur. You get to deploy the stranger fantasy here as well, but add a scenario where one of you isn’t wearing any clothes and have hands all over you. Set up a comfortable massage table and create a spa environment. Dress in the comfortable clothes of massage therapists to set the tone. Then, gather massage oils and set dim lighting. In character, get your client to lay down and start the massage. Slowly but surely, get a little naughtier in your touches while still keeping up that sense of anticipation and surprise. Eventually, it will become a massage you’re not likely to forget.
There’s a lot of sensuality in a power dynamic, and dressing up as a police officer is a great way to explore this. Find a costume and buy some handcuffs. Make your arrest, handcuff your partner, and frisk them to see if they’re hiding any weapons. Perhaps you might even interrogate them using any means necessary until they confess.
Pool cleaner (or landscaper)
Another blissfully effortless scenario, a pretend pool cleaner or landscaper, requires nothing fancy or over the top. A tight pair of jeans and a plain white tee shirt combined with tools on hand works like a charm. For this, your partner is outside and working up a serious sweat. Maybe their shirt comes off when the sun becomes too much to bear. You, the ever-generous homeowner, bring out some ice-cold lemonade to cool them down only to find yourself heating up just as much. Practice your flirting skills and let them know how much you can’t resist them. If you’re able to in your outdoor space, stay out there keep playing. It’ll add a hint of taboo to have the sunshine and breeze hit your skin.
Pirate / Captive
If you’re ready to take whimsy to the next level, you’re set for the pirate and captive role play. Since this fantasy requires full regalia, you should prepare to laugh at yourselves a bit more than usual here. Start by dressing up as a maiden in an old-style dress, then get captured by your pirate who’s more than willing to impress you with their sword. Your pirate will take you as their bounty after they raid your ship. Where you take this next depends on your comfort with your partner to really explore your desires. Perhaps you’re the pirate’s prisoner and trussed up, or the pirate demands that you entertain him in his quarters with a dance.
Boss / Secretary
A fun way to explore power dynamics in your relationship is the boss and secretary fantasy. If you’re secretly harboring thoughts of exploring submission, this is perfect for getting your toes (and panties) wet. Dress in your proper business attire and get down to business. If you’re playing up the authority figure, you can pretend that a terrible error has been found, and punishment needs to be doled out. The secretary will be punished for their oversights, perhaps with a spanking from a wooden ruler. If submission isn’t your thing, maybe your desperate for a raise and willing to do anything to get one. Walk into your boss’s office, willing to do anything you need to do to get your way.
Another terrifically flexible role-playing idea is the professor-student exchange. You can make this one fit all of the kinks you wish to explore, and the props consist of things you already own. Imagine that you’re the professor and your student is coming in during office hours only to learn they are dangerously close to losing their scholarship and willing to do anything for extra credit to keep up their GPA. Conversely, imagine you’re the professor, and you just discovered that your naughty student cheated on their exam. Demand that they convince you to keep their secret to yourself and offer up ways of earning your silence after you punish them, of course.
Another great way to explore touch and enjoy a slow build-up is the fitness instructor role-play. You’re both wearing tight clothes and not a lot of them either. You start out your fitness class warming up, and then your instructor needs to provide you with some 1:1 lessons when you have a hard time getting into some poses or positions. Your partner is the instructor, more than happy to help bend and twist you while adding a caress or two along the way. It won’t be long before the clothes start flying off.
Beach Town Local
If you’re on vacation together, the opportunities for frivolity should be plentiful. A beach vacation light on clothes and responsibilities is a perfect time to role-play. Pretend that you’re traveling alone and taking in the sun on the beach when you ask the stranger closest to you to help get sunscreen on all of those hard to reach spots. Your partner lends you a hand and offers to buy you a drink and take you dancing at their favorite local places. After, bring them back to the hotel and really get to know one another.
Role-playing with celebrity characters can be a great way to tap into confidence that you might feel that person excuses if you’re feeling shy to get started. It’s also easy to act like a character that you’ve watched on screen and have material to copy instead of drawing from thin air. First, pick your favorite athlete, rock star, or movie character, then gather your costume together. Superheroes are fantastic material in this fantasy. Pretend that Thor has to rescue you or if you’re feeling particularly adventurous, pretend that you’re the villain and have to wrestle Thor to victory until one of you prevails.
Whichever way you end up going, remember to the goal is to have fun. Don’t take yourselves too seriously, and you’ll both have a great time!